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The common wisdom is that the best you can hope for is to balance work and life. I think it's all wrong. Passion + your strengths = success and happiness. Do less of what you don't like and more of what you do.
A rediscovered old truth
Anyone who has sustained amazing business success will tell you that two ingredients are necessary: (i) self-belief and (ii) doing something you enjoy. The trouble is, most of us don’t fully get what the second requirement is all about. Creating and keeping something significant takes a lot of work. This applies whether you want happy relationships, a great career or business, or a lovely family. How are you going to sustain the effort if you are not fully focussed on why you enjoy it? You will get moments of weakness that will let you down.
You have to always ask WHY you want what you want. Even more importantly, what will your achievement enable you to continuously do, or be, or have? What will be happening? Go out to that future, now, and check – does it make you really excited, ongoing? It has to have real passion and meaning to you. Try it this way – imagine all your bills, your mortgage, your concerns were all met; what would you be doing in life then? The answer gives you clues about what you need to be doing. When it comes to business, make sure you pick out things that you are naturally excellent at.
Inspiration only comes when you put yourself on the edge; when you burn your boats; when you take a risk and invest in yourself. At that very point, your mind gets creative; you tune into new ideas and get creative. If you don’t, you stay just ‘off-station’ and no new information will come to you. It’s rather like the difference between tuning into a live broadcast compared to listening into a replay of yesterday’s news. This is ancient wisdom, consistent with Hindu, Buddhist, Christian, and Jewish traditions, which hold to a sacred truth: ‘live in the present moment’. Many people think that this is only a modern idea. It has been held true for thousands of years.
So, the ancient wisdom, just as the modern business gurus, say get rid of all self-doubt or bad feelings that get in the way, and make sure you are being authentic to yourself. Invest in being yourself – all other posts are taken! Listen to no reasons or excuses – they become self-fulfilling alibis. Get whatever help you can to speed this up. In this current financial environment, where the tide has gone out, so-to-speak, it’s time now to have a good look at what it reveals on the exposed beach. It’s an opportunity you may not get twice.
In the flow
Ever had that wonderful, timeless feeling that arises when you're absorbed in a challenging task, one that stretches your abilities but doesn't exceed them? Pioneering psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi called this state 'flow'. Countless studies have shown that flow is highly rewarding and usually provokes feelings of joy afterwards. Little researched until now, however, is the idea of 'social flow', which can arise when a group of people are absorbed together in a challenging task. In a new study, Charles Walker finds that social flow is associated with more joy than solitary flow - 'that doing it together is better than doing it alone'. He concluded by leaving open the question of why more social tasks lead to a form of flow that provokes more joy. Source BPS Blog where you can read the full article.
A take-away restaurant near your house might offer free home delivery or a ten per cent discount if you collect. It sounds much better than saying you get no discount for picking up and suffer a ten per cent fee for delivery – this is the power of spin or ‘framing’ (which we teach in NLP). Now David Hardisty and colleagues have dug a little deeper into framing, to show first, that these kinds of effects can interact with people's political persuasion, and second, that they can act by altering the order of people's thoughts. Source BPS Blog where you can read the full article.
Here's one for the boys at Top Gear to think about - apparently having an obsessive passion for driving can predispose people towards aggression behind the wheel. The idea is that for these people, driving has become an overpowering compulsion, such that an obstacle - for example, a slow driver in front - provokes great frustration, which leads to anger, which explains why they sometimes drive right up your bumper and flash their headlights.
'When obsessively passionate, the person wants to pursue activity engagement because of an internal compulsion that comes to control him or her,' the researchers explained. 'Within such a state, being prevented from engaging in the activity by an external agent is conducive to anger toward this agent.' Source BPS Blog where you can read the full article.
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